hmm...
I know I'm supposed to be doing my history homework, and washing the dishes...but I want to do something else. Like what? I have no idea. I had fun today at Say Si, although I didn't get much done. Well, I kinda did...
And I wrote this story. It's really short and pretty much goes nowhere. Here it goes... and please post with ideas because I don't know what to do with it. :P
As Carly waits, she turns to the bulletin board in the hall. There, she mindlessly writes a poem, with those small words on magnets that she loves but never really pays attention to. She grabs the word "want" and thinks for a second before placing the rest of the sentence. Now it reads, "want faithful tongue and luscious summer beauty." She searches, her eyes darting back and forth to the words on paper glued to strips of magnet. "Where's the 'I' ?" she asks herself, frustrated. She is listening to Bjork, her tortured voice gently singing, "I love him, I love him, I love him, I love him." A car honks outside.
...although I am not done with my homework..
I am in love with the world. When my mommy got home, she said, "so...." and I was wondering what she was talking about...and she dragged it out like one of those reality shows...kind of like what I'm doing right now... And she handed me an envelope. With a Morrissey ticket inside! Yay! Of course, it was bought with my own money. But either way, I'm so freaking happy! So I'm going with Nina and the girls. And my life is complete.
I also got to see Garden State today after all, but I went by myself. Sad, but true. I liked it, though. Being with myself was fun and well-needed.
HELP!!
I'm at home and my mom says I can't go ANYWHERE until I finish my homework. What she doesn't get is that I have no clue how to actually DO the homework, and the book is really not helping me. What do I do? I wanted to see Garden State today. So I really really need help, and if anyone is looking at my blog then please post a comment or email me, because I am completely and utterly lost.
look at me-i'm sandra dee!
Today we went on the DC field trip andit sort of sucked. I mean, it wasn't really worth it to be at school at 6:45 for(sentence structure...?). Anyway, on the way there we watched Armageddon, and on the way back we watched Grease, up to "Hopelessly Devoted to You". I guess I never realized that it is the cheesiest movie ever. Also, when we were leaving Austin to go to San Marcos, me and Sara tried to get on the bus that had all our friends, but they made us get off and go to the other bus. Too bad. Josh and Claire didn't go on the other bus like we planned! Jerks. But that's ok. I was really carsick, too. The dumb bus driver sucked. I remember passing this vintage store in Austin called Blue Velvet on Guadalupe near MLK. It's some sort of vintage place. I want to go there!
all is well in the world
I'm at the Central Library and it feels good to write in my blog, after reading some fiction. I love fiction. But I can't check out any books because I have a fine of $18.45 on my library card. I have never had a fine so high!! I'm like the person who never has delinquencies on her card. But it's all because of 4 CDs that I had overdue for like 2 1/2 weeks. Yeah...I guess I'll have to just read friends' books until I pay the fine. That's horrid.
But I don't need to talk about horrid things, because the world is really a nice place...If you're mostly hanging out in libraries, art studios and gardens. Those are some of my favorite places, and I really like being at home, but sometimes I get too attatched, and end up a bum at home. It's nice to be away, especially because my room is really messy. I like going to the Southwest school of Art and Craft, but I'm only taking ceramics classes, and I'd really like to take some sort of a painting or photography class. A figure drawing class would be nice, also. I'm going to my throwing class now. Until next time (probably tomorrow),
Carly G. :)
clever title
Ms. Sarratt moved me all the way across the room from Monica on Friday. I was really sad. She was like my favorite teacher but now she's really mean. she said I wasn't allowed to sit there anymore, because I talked too much. It seems like lately teachers refuse to be your friend. She seems like she really doesn't like school, and like she hates it when it's loud, and is really passive-agressive. She makes me want to cry. Seriously. I hope Monica's not mad at me, cause John talked to her on friday and said that she kind of was.
Mozheads
I am so happy. I went out on Friday with my friends to the Echidnas' last show. It was fun, but this is even better. The girls started talking about how they were going to go see Morrissey in Austin in October. And they invited me...and I'm going. Yay! I'm going to cry. I was even talking to a guy who had seen Morrissey and he said that he cried when he saw him. So I won't feel stupid. If we get him to sign anything for us, we're going to get tattoos of it. His signature, I mean.
sleep deprivation
It seems like every night i get less and less sleep. Like I'll go to bed at 10 one night, then the next night I'll go to bed at 11. The next night will be midnight, and last night it was one. I'm not planning on going to bed at two tonight, though. Because hopefully I won't have that much homework. I went to the library with John and Monica yesterday and we spent three freaking hours there and barely got anything done. But i did get two books and a CD. Yay! I'm in technology class right now and I'm actually supposed to be looking at the school webpage, but it's kinda boring. Gotta go.
Wee!
I knew it..
Of course. I knew my feeling of okay-ness wouldn't last. I guess I just feel bombarded with all this homework and the chemistry problems I don't understand. I guess I just need to actually read the book and try to pay attention in class..no matter how much I think I should be doing other, more important things. That's where I end up thinking I have ADD..Because I may be doing something, but I get distracted and thinking that I should be doing something else, so I end up trying to do both things at the same time and end up having nothing done. Does that make any sense? It seems to happen to me every single day. I can't avoid it, or keep my mind on one thing for any period of time. Well, except for things like this blog and art projects and things like that (of course, doing this blog takes up time that is supposed to be used for homework). Those types of things I can do for hours on end. But math and solving things that don't make any sense to me in the first place? Not five minutes and I am back to where I started.
Other than school trouble, I feel my life is pretty normal and balanced, and I know that once summer comes I'll be ok. Mind you, summer is in 9 months. But I didn't have much of a summer this year because I was too busy working at Askew and becoming a slave to Colleen's sadistic scheme. She wanted me to sign away my soul, and I just couldn't do it. So after July 25, I never showed up again. Of course, that only left two weeks out of that whole summer for me to have time to myself. One of those weeks being spent in the lovely city of Seattle with one of my paternal aunts, of which I have two.
I forgot to leave the number to Say Si with my mom, so she ended up not getting me an appointment for an interview and I ended up waiting until they were closed to decide to call them. So I must make an appointment tomorrow during school. I hope I can be in it, because I really want to have a place to go afterschool.
Oh! I completely forgot until now! Incubus is playing tonight. Here. In San Antonio. A one-time event and I decided to miss it. Aagh! They are probably playing as we speak. I'm going to cry.
it's that darn homework.
Right now I feel pretty good, like I don't really have much to worry about. Like maybe everything will just fall into place soon if I just let it. But I know this feeling won't stay, especially after I go to school tomorrow. I still have homework to do, and I sort of feel like it's overwhelming me. This weekend a friend read my cards, my tarot cards that is, and pretty much what she said was what was happening. She said that I felt a lot of things were coming at me at the same time, causing me to be overwhelmed. And also that everything is in place except for one thing, and that I just need to let that one thing go. What that thing is, though, i'm not sure. I suppose it could be death. I am constantly afraid of it. It is always chewing away at my brain, my mind, and it won't seem to go away. Well, I guess that was obvious. I feel a bit new now, sort of blank and refreshed. Like if I didn't have homework I would be totally cool with my life.
well, here it is.
I wish I had the enthusiasm of that history girl from the Old Navy commercial. I freaking hate school. I have no motivation at all. I wish there were some way just to make me de-stress and concentrate, I mean, that's all I really want. I just want to be able to concentrate in school and get good grades and not be stressed about my life and other peoples' death. I'm sick of it. I am so sick of it. I suppose I brought it upon myself, I mean, I'm talking all pre-AP and AP classes. There's gotta be some time between where I can be tired. Right?
shit...
Yesterday and today were the weirdest days. A friend of mine from school passed away and I found out yesterday after seeing the movie. I was so happy one second, because I had seen Garden State, and so sad after I got the message. It was so unreal. It is so unreal. I still think about it and I cannot believe it. I just went to the viewing today and I really freaked out, but you couldn't tell from looking at me. God..tomorrow they're going to have the burial and everything. I don't really want to go, but I also don't want to go to school. I gotta go.
Maybe bass
Going to see Garden State today for the second time. I never go see movies in the theater more than once. My mom is forcing me to go to the pool with her and I dont want to go. I just kinda want to stay home and listen to the radiohead live CD I borrowed from Nina. It's freaking great music, man. I wish I was in Radiohead. I'd play keyboard or guitar. Maybe bass.
"Yesterday I woke up sucking a lemon..."
fire drill
we just had a fire drill, and when I came back into the building I heard teachers barking at children to go to 3rd period. So now I'm in 3rd period at Justin's laptop. When we were outside for the drill I saw my best friend with this guy and it kinda got me sad. ugh.
